bad driving.

what annoys the living daylights out of me? bad drivers. i know you know what i'm talking about. they make you late, make you mad, or make you throw out that occasional word of choice that your mother would wash your mouth out with soap if she heard. simple as that. although, the types of bad drivers is a true delicacy; a science even. if you fall into any of these categories, sorry. it's not personal. okay, it is. being a teenager, i'm the best driver on the road. believe it.

the no blinker but surprise, i'm turning.

i don't care how cheap your car is. it came with a blinker. don't try to prove otherwise. if anything, using your blinker gives your left arm a workout, and keeps me from screaming in your face. what a win win situation.

the i have to come to a complete stop before i make a right turn.

seriously? don't go up on two wheels, now. you're out of control. your alignment and shocks will be fine, you can turn a little faster. this tends to be a common trend among women.

the i boom my bass to make you want to punch a baby.

excuse me, your bass is so loud i can't even tell what song you're listening to. the best educated guess that i can make is that it's in the rap genre. you're also interrupting my jam session to wicked or glee with your incessant bass earthquake.

the i'm going to honk my horn because the light just turned green.

here is my usual routine. i'm behind somebody at a green light, and they're not going. i'll say "come onnn. helloooo?" and then count to three. and then honk. common courtesy. getting honked at is embarrassing. but these jerks are the guys that honk the second the light has turned green. i'm sorry, is this a horse race? can you give me 2 seconds to move my foot from the brake to the gas pedal? because of this, i drive through the intersection as slow as possible.

the i brake every five seconds.

i really don't know what's trying to be accomplished here. do you have ocd and have to brake as a ritual? are you just paranoid they won't work like they did five seconds ago? are you braking at a green light just in case it turns yellow? are you braking to the beat of your music? (guilty.) not to be prejudice, but usually the people doing this are wearing these orthotic shoes as shown above.

the i'm going to be the slow car in the left lane.

i want to punch you in the mouth. that is all.

the tailgater.

i'm already speeding in the left lane. this should be sufficient. get off my tail, i'm not scared of you and your "get 'er done" bumper stickers. i don't care how many times you rev your f350 engine at me, really. actually, to make you even more frustrated, i'll make sure i'm even with the car in the next lane.

but i'm a good driver. i promise.