terryclothin' it.

no post tuesday. sorry to break your heart. then again, i am here now, so pick your battles.

today, you will hear about my embarrassing story. believe it or not, i embarrassed myself this morning. i know this rarely happens due to my rico suave personality and i live life relatively smoothly, so seize the moment. look, i'll stop lying and jump to humilation.

this morning, i took a shower. it was a wednesday, so i was obligated to take my bi-weekly rinse off to get me through saturday. i was frantically trying to get ready for a lunch at 1145, so i was running around and frolicking throughout my house in my towel. as i was already sweating from this (shocker.) i realized "oh heeeeeeeck nah i haven't had my coffee yet." so then i frantically start to make my coffee. and then i realize "oh heeeeeck nah my coffee thermos is in my car." mind you, i'm still in my terrycloth ensemble. i think to myself, "it'll be fine, i'm just running to my car and i live on a kuldesac, no one will see me." ha. so here i am, running to my car, and of course THE GARBAGE MAN IS WALKING TO THE BACK OF OUR HOUSE TO GET OUR TRASH. sounds like his lucky day. although, i'm 67% sure he vomited in the trash can once he passed me, because i had mascara running down my face like mufasa or a crack addict and a towel on, while sweating. good morning to you, sir. also keep in mind i am painfully awkward, so of course i have to say something. so "oh gosh, hi. i'm just getting my coffee cup, but i just got out of the shower and didn't have time to get dressed to get it" comes catapulting out of my mouth.

1) how do i not have time to get dressed? get yourself together, ab.

2) why didn't i just walk back inside?

3) WHY DID I TALK TO HIM?

you give me legitimate solutions, i give you legitimate love.

this story was not as funny as i anticipating look back. not as funny as when i sneezed and farted during the taks test. or played handbells when i was 7. or farted on national television during a somersault. or had my pants rip from top of bottom during school. you win some, you lose some. for me, i lose all the time.